Thursday, May 10, 2012

Yeah, I Have Issues...

First and foremost, let me say that I love my wife and admire her patience with me.  Especially when it comes to that one issue with which I seem to have a never-ending fascination and continual struggle: my hair.

Now folks who knew me back in high school might remember that at that time I sported a decent mop of hair--but that was the late 80s/early 90s, and big hair was the norm.  I can honestly and with so small amount of pride say that I never rocked a mullet, however, as a recent review of my senior yearbook revealed was far more popular at my high school than I remember.  In fact, my hair has never been over my shirt collar, and I've never liked it if my hair touched my ears...although I have long wondered what it would be like to have really long hair, like the drummer from Hootie and the Blowfish.

Since about 1995 and the first time I took a razor to my scalp, I have tended to keep my hair more on the short side, and in recent years really short.  Here's where I admit I'm probably bi-polar.  It's not that I don't want hair--in fact, right after I cut it all off, quite often I wish I hadn't gone quite so short.  On the other hand, I really don't like combing my hair, especially since I have to get up really early.  And then there's my life-long aversion to using "product" to style my hair, but my wispy hair refuses to do anything other than stick out at my cowlicks or hang straight down.  And I won't get into my issues about paying for haircuts that look like crap, except to say why would I pay for a horrible haircut when I can do it myself for free?  Oh, and it doesn't help that a co-worker recently pointed out that I have a few gray hairs.

Now Mali, bless her heart, has told me before that she likes how I look with hair that might actually require combing, but of late has resigned herself to the fact that 90 percent of my self-inflicted haircuts end with me being very close to bald.  I recently decided that maybe it was time to try growing it out again, but that still requires occasional maintenance around the back and ears, and tonight was one of those touch-up sessions.

After I finished cutting my hair and showered and cleaned up the bathroom, I asked Mali what she thought.  Her reply: "What, are you trying to have a hairstyle or something?"


She did follow it up with some comments along the lines of, "You'll just end up cutting it all of anyway." and "I stopped trying to get you to grow it out years ago."

I think the reality is that Mali is trying to use reverse psychology to get me to grow my hair out again.  But I think I'm on to her wily methods...